


Three Lies

by Jean_C_Pepper



Category: Batman (Movies - Nolan)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-07
Updated: 2010-09-07
Packaged: 2017-10-11 14:18:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/113293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jean_C_Pepper/pseuds/Jean_C_Pepper
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This chapter does contain Bottom! Bruce.</p></blockquote>





	1. Inevitable

You don't know why you find yourself more excited at the prospect of catching the Joker and returning him to Arkham but you are. You realized a while back that you enjoy fighting with the green haired fiend more than you should. And so it was that you found yourself in an alley with your archenemy. You have to work to keep the grin off your face at some of his jokes. Finally, you are able to take his knife away and you have him pressed up against the wall when he does something completely insane. That is, even more insane than anything else he's done and that's really saying something. He somehow manages to wrap his legs around your waist and has you groin to groin in a death grip with his legs.

"That's more like it," he purrs. And you are horrified. Surely, surely he can't know about the times that you have gone home and jerked off to the thought of pressing him against a wall (like now) and taking what you want. You are so caught up in the reality of this that you can't move and it takes him a second to realize that you haven't. "More like it," he murmurs again and your eyes follow the tip of his tongue as it swipes over his bottom, then his top lip. You find yourself leaning forward and you are about a centimeter away from kissing him when you both hear,

"There he is," you are forced to drop the Joker and get out of there because the police are still after you and you don't want to get caught. So, you go home and jerk off and go to bed. In the morning, you're grouchy with Alfred and you slink to the office. Your bad mood lasts the entire day and that evening you read in the paper that the police apprehended the Joker and returned him to Arkham.

 

Later, you are with the current bimbo du jour, a honey blonde whose name you can't remember. You are fucking her, not necessarily roughly but definitely not making love. She is acting like she is into it and you wonder if she's faking. Suddenly his face pops into your head and before you can stop yourself, you begin to imagine him under you. You try to rein your thoughts in, but to no avail because now it's actually starting to feel good. She moans your name as you come but it's his face that you see. Afterward, you get up and leave without kissing her goodbye. She'll tell everyone that you were an asshole but you're used to that and you don't really care. You need to see him so you go home and change and drive the new and very much improved Tumbler over to the Arkham Asylum.

You have been breaking into Arkham Asylum for a while. It is really the only way to keep an eye on criminals. He doesn't stay in Arkham long, it's been less than a week but you find him easily. You are quiet because they usually put him into a cell next to Crane and Crane is just as obsessed as he is.

He is sleeping and drugged when you find him but you hide in the corner and watch him for a while. He doesn't wake up and you vow to return the next night. On the way home, you outrace the police for fun and end up taking an hour trip into the country to shake them. It works out some of your aggression and you go home and go to bed.

In the morning, you don't feel like getting up and going to work so you decide to play self-indulgent playboy and stay in bed for a while. You loaf and watch TV and it is noon before you finally get up. You send the bimbo from last night a piece of jewelry and a note and then you decide to head to the bat cave to work on some ideas. This works because it takes your mind off of thinking about him.. and the hours pass quickly.

This time when you sneak into Arkham, he is awake. You can tell the moment you enter his cell. They always put him in the same cell, the high security cell but there's a secret way in. He is aware of you as well.

"Well, well, well.. it's the bat. How did you get in?"

"You should know. You escape from here often enough." You sense him smiling and you realize that he has gotten up from his bunk. You are still standing against the wall and it is so dark in the cell that you can barely make him out. He is closer than you realize before he speaks again.

"Have you come to finish what got interrupted the other night?" he asked, still keeping his voice soft. You don't say anything and you don't realize that he's even closer until he bumps right into you and then he kind of leans against your armor. He's taller than you thought, but slight and wiry and you stand there and don't do anything and he brings your mouths closer together and then you kiss.

You both have your mouths open and your tongues kind of slide against each other and it feels really amazing and you realize that this kiss is better than fucking the blonde. You kiss for a while and then he lets out a high pitched giggle that is a bit louder than he probably intended and you decide that it's time to go.

 

 

The next morning, you are not at all surprised to find out with your morning paper that the Joker has escaped from Arkham Asylum again. And, to be honest, it doesn't really surprise you that you get a card in the afternoon mail. It is his trademark Joker card with an address on it. Below he has written

"Shed your mask and join me". So, you go out to the address and it is a small house in the Narrows. When you get there, the door is unlocked and you go in and you find him. You find that your mouth drops open because he has removed his makeup. His skin without the makeup is slightly tanned and his hair is the same honey blonde as what's-her-face,

"Hello, Brucey," he says softly.

"Wow," you say. "Come here." He looks nervous but he does as you ask. When you get close enough, you grab him and kiss him fiercely. When you come up for air, you gently trace the horrific scars with your fingertips. "I really like your face without makeup," you tell him before kissing him again. He seems to like your words and you kiss for a while before nipping his ear, "But, I can't call you Joker in here," you murmur, ghosting your lips down his neck. "Do you have another name?" At this he looks confused.

"I don't remember it," he whispers. His eyes start to look stormy and you kiss him again.

"How about John?" You suggest, "Like John Doe." He nods at your suggestion and you kiss him again as he relaxes and you pull his body against yours. You realize that he wanted you to meet him here without makeup so that you will reject him. The knowledge makes you feel powerful, that you know him better than he knows himself.

"Where's the bedroom?" you ask, the next time that he comes up for air. It turns out that there isn't a bedroom. Instead, he leads you into a main room and folds out a couch. You help him take the sheets out of their wrapper and the blankets. He begins to look nervous when you look at him and bring him close again.

"Take your clothes off," you order. He shivers and complies. You take yours off too and your bodies slam together with more force than you anticipated at first. You kiss again and this time when you break for breath, you whisper, "Why?"

"Because as much as you hate me and we fight and we rage, maybe the first time didn't need to be about that. Maybe I didn't want my first sight of you-in bed- to be in your cowl."

You can understand this and you agree with it so you nod and then he kisses you and flips you over on your back.

"Hey!"

"Don't worry Brucey, I know you're not a catcher. But, I want to try something," He licks his lips and stares at your dick and you can actually feel yourself getting harder. You've dreamed of his mouth on you and you try to stay still as he kisses his way down your body.

You lean on your elbows and watch him as he snakes out a tongue and licks the side of your cock like a lollipop. You realize that you are holding your breath as he lowers his mouth onto you and-oh g-his mouth feels wonderful. He is pulling on your hips and you oblige by thrusting into his mouth. He moans around your cock and you almost lose it from the sensations. You aren't going to last long if he keeps this up and you pull him off and kiss him again before rolling him on his back and spreading his legs.

This part makes you really nervous. Once you realized that you were fantasizing about him, then you did do some research and watched some porn. Even though you think that porn is incredibly phony, you do get the general idea of what goes where. You actually showed up to this meeting prepared and there is lube in your pants pocket, which you reach over and grab. He leans up on his elbows to see what you are doing and smiles when he sees the lube.

"Just like a boyscout, eh, Brucey?" He teases. You have put lube on your finger before inserting it inside him. He gasps at this and you are not sure if you are doing this right. Your finger brushes up against something inside him and he moans and his eyes roll back into his head. You do it again. "Fuck, Brucey," he gasps and moves himself on your hand to try to get you to do it again. You figure that this means he's ready.

You apply a generous amount of lube to yourself and again climb between his legs. You line your cock up with the dusky pucker you find between his well-rounded cheeks and begin to push in. He is unbelievably hot and tight inside and you are trying to be careful not to hurt him, so you are going slow. Well, you go slow at first until he pushes back against you and starts moving to meet your thrusts. Then, slow and careful pretty much go out the window especially as he starts whimpering things like "harder" and "faster" and the need to pound into him seems to overpower everything else. You grab his hips hard and pull him into your lap. One hand pinches his nipple while the other one reaches around and grasps his cock. Your teeth find his neck and you bite and suck hard enough to leave a nice purple mark and he moans and comes all over your hand. You really weren't prepared for that and the sight is incredibly erotic and before you can really take stock of what is going on, your orgasm rushes over you like a wave and you moan as you come. This is much better than fucking what's-her-face and you wonder if you'll fuck another model again-ever-if he allows you access to his ass on a regular basis. He is looking pretty content and his mouth is hanging open and you lean over and kiss him.

Afterward, you stretch out on the sofa bed. The mattress on that thing is horrible and you vow to find a hideout the next time so at least you can have a decent bed.

He doesn't say anything for a while and you marvel that you have actually found a way to make him shut up. When he finally does speak, he says, "Damn Brucey. If that's sex as Bruce, I can't wait to see what Batman does".


	2. Understanding

It's the loneliness that drove you to it. This is the excuse you give yourself when you the reality of your time with J becomes a reality. J-who are you kidding- you spent the afternoon and most of the evening fucking the Joker. And, to make it worse, you have spent considerable time trying to figure out where and when you could meet him again. It's the loneliness that does it.

When your parents died, everything changed, It was years later when you realized that the change was Batman. At the time, all you could feel was hollow and empty. Now, Everything feels kind of hazy from that time, but you can remember how Rachel looked at you-hurt written across her twelve year old face. You couldn't explain it to her. She didn't understand. It was for this reason as much as any other that you decide to leave Gotham. To try and alleviate some of the loneliness. To try and find someone who understands. It works-partly-in that you find the tools to hone the darkness inside you into something that will actually help Gotham. But the loneliness is still there. Rachel doesn't understand any more than she did before and the models are oblivious to anyone but themselves.

Gordon accepts you but he doesn't understand you. No one does- until him. He gets you. All of you. You gave into your desire and fucked him senseless. And you did it roughly. And he welcomed it. He didn't want you to be anyone other than who you were. At least, this is what you keep telling yourself as you attend yet another boring fundraiser. The only plus to this evening is that your date-a stunning olive skinned beauty from Bhutan- senses that you aren't really interested in her and while she is the perfect escort-she leaves you alone. You vow to send her one hell of a gift tomorrow for being such a great date. The evening ends and you head home and you change and you go to Gordon's. He's there and he comes out to talk and he's nervous because the Joker isn't in Arkham but out on the street. He's been hearing some odd rumors. You leave and drive the new tumbler around the narrows for a while. It's quiet, too quiet and you decide to get out and patrol on foot. You come to a building which is much too quiet and then you hear his maniacal cackle. You go in and you see three mutilated rottweilers.

"'Ah," you hear his nasal voice." It's the Batman."

"What did you do to those dogs?" The disgust is evident in your voice.

"Well, ah, bats, I had to teach someone a lesson. Did I ever mention that I was a chem minor in college?"

Out of all the things that have come out of his mouth, somehow you know that this one is true. You are overwhelmed with feelings of rage and anger. He has reminded you again what he is and you want to give in to this anger. You start to fight with him- and he is laughing hysterically as you do fight. Somehow you have him against a wall and his pants are don and you lube up and thrust in savagely. He giggles again and pushes back against you. You shove him against the wall and fuck him hard, thinking that you are punishing him. This illusion is shattered by him coming hard, his body shaking with the force of his orgasm. You growl and rip his shirt and leave a savage love bite on his neck as you release deep in his body. Afterwords, you shove him away from you and disappear into the night.

 

It is three days before a joker card is delivered to your house. You write an address and time and stick it to the door of the building you fought in the other night. Somehow you know he'll get it.

 

You get there early and you realize that your hands are shaking. You want him that much. He comes into the house through the back way and he enters so quietly that all of a sudden, there he is.

"Brucey" he smiles at you and you realize that he still has his makeup on, although it is cracked and worn off in places.

"Come here,"' you pull him towards you and wrap your arms around him and kiss him. He kisses you back, hungrily.

"Why do I want to kill you half the time?" You whisper into his hair.

"Because, Brucey- you love me and you hate me."

"You told me that before," you comment. You grab him and drag him to the bathroom where you proceed to undress him and shove him in the shower. Inside, you soap him down, marveling at the scars on his chest and stomach and an especially long one down his side. You trace it gently with your fingers and then you take a flannel cloth and wash the makeup off of his face. Even with the dark circles under his eyes and the scars around his mouth, you still think that he's beautiful and you feel embarrassed at feeling this way. You like looking at him and you wonder at this because you have never felt this way before and you don't feel this way about any other man.

You're both soapy and you turn him around to rinse his back, pulling him against you so that his cock brushes against yours. He pulls you down for a kiss and you roll your tongue around the scarred inside of his mouth. Your hands drift across his wet skin and you marvel how good it feels to be with him. You realized the second that you got through the door that the loneliness is gone. As wrong as it is-this is the man that killed Rachel- he makes you feel whole. You know that no matter what you do- he will accept it. He is looking at you with adoration in his eyes and you kiss him again, pressing his body into the cool bath tile.

"Come on, " you whisper, turning off the water. " I don't want to do this here." You dry him off with thick towels that are in the closet and then you go into the bedroom where there is a nice bed with a firm mattress. . This time the mattress is considerably firmer and there are several blankets. You wonder if the next time you can sneak him into a suite at your hotel. You think about how immensely pleasurable it would be to fuck him in a hot tub or feed him food from room service and then you laugh at yourself for being such a sap.

"Is something funny, Brucey? " he asks as you towel his hair off.

"I am a fool. I was thinking of us together at the hotel."

He doesn't say anything to this and you both lay down on the bed and you pull him towards you and kiss for a while. You really like kissing him because it feels so alive and you use your fingertips to explore the scars on his maimed body and he writhes under your touch. You follow your fingers with your lips and he is moaning softly and begging when you push him on his stomach and finally enter him.

This is very different from what you did in the abandoned building but no less exciting. You see the bruise you left on his neck-vividly purple. You bite the spot again- this time gently- and he shudders against you. Your mouth finds his and you kiss intently as you thrust into him and he rocks back on your cock.

"Brucey," he moans. And you reach around him and grasp his cock and bite and thrust harder and he gives a gasp and comes all over your hand. His body closes around yours as he bucks in the grips of his orgasm and you can't help it. You join him in orgasm, moaning softly in his ear as you come.

You find yourself drifting towards sleep- which you didn't do before. You wonder if he will slit your throat while your asleep

"You don't have to worry, Brucey," he whispers as he snuggles towards you and you pull the comforter over you both. " I told you before. I won't kill you because you're just too much fun. And I said that before we started fucking. "

You pull him close and whisper in his ear.' I am going to fuck you into this mattress when I wake up."

And, with that, you both fall asleep.


	3. Drama Queen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter does contain Bottom! Bruce.

So, it's been more than a year since you started your liaison with him. Sometimes it doesn't seem that long and others, it seems like it has been much longer than that. You can't help it. He eases the loneliness.

Unfortunately, getting fucked by you regularly only goes so far in taming his personality. He still initiates intricate games to mess with your head and sometimes, despite your best efforts, people die.

Even so, you find his games exciting and then you feel guilty about it. He gets you in a way that no one else does and you find this invaluable.

Lately, you have been having some very disturbing thoughts. You find yourself fantasizing about him fucking you and this completely creeps you out. You have only been topped once and this was by the man you knew as Henri Ducard. It was for training purposes and did not really have anything to do with sex, per se, and it wasn't pleasant. In fact, it was one of the most unpleasant experiences of your life. One that was so unpleasant that you really never wanted to revisit that situation again. . But, this new feeling, it has crept up on you suddenly. You'll be jerking off in the shower, idly thinking about him and then all of a sudden your fantasy will switch up on you. It's hard enough to try and not have an orgasm to something that is admittedly intriguing you, but you have a feeling that he actually knows what you're thinking. The fucker is annoyingly prescient. It's eerie. The first morning after your first night actually sleeping together, he raised an eyebrow, licked his lips and said," So Brucey, exactly what prison did you do your time in?"  
You gaped at him and tried to avoid his questions, but he was having none of it. You ended up having to set some rules about what was permissible as Batman and what as Bruce, which proved beneficial. You also ended up telling him about prison, in increments. You realize from the first that it is good to have someone to talk to, even if it is a homicidal clown. Now, a year later, the rules are set in stone.

Except, now you want something new. You think about it and you realize that you want to be able give up control. To trust someone enough to let them have that control. And, it really says something about you that the only person you would even consider trusting that much is him, but there you go.

 

You are both in your favorite hideout. This is the only place that you've come to more than once. It is a cabin about an hour outside of Gotham on a stretch of land that is owned by a company that is owned by a company that is owned by another company that may be controlled by Wayne Enterprises.

The cabin is small, really just one room with a kitchenette and a bathroom. You have a satellite dish up here, but the two of you rarely turn on the television. There are other more interesting things to do.

Currently, you are pouring hot wax onto his back in an approximation of a bat(his request). You are using the heat safe wax, now. The both of you thought that it was too pussy to use at first but after you had a second degree smiley face on your butt that you tried to explain away to Alfred as a dog bite, you switched to this stuff which proved pleasurable but not as scar inducing.

 

You don't think Alfred really believed you about the dog and the other marks you've tried to attribute to various models. He hasn't confronted you about it, but you know that there's a heavy conversation with him coming up in your future. You try not to think about it too much.

 

J switches places with you and you stretch out on your stomach, offering your scarred back for his wax artwork. You think about how much it took for you to even give this much control to him at first. He had had to threaten to tie you up to get you to be still but once you let go, it was glorious. It wasn't even about pain, which you thought that it would be. It was all about allowing him that control. And being marked. You like him marking you...almost as much as you like marking him. He smirks and mutters something about bats being territorial and you decide that cashmere turtlenecks and sport coats make a good look.

 

When he finishes, he whispers in your ear," You're thinking tonight's the night, Brucey. Tonight you want to ride the Joker.". When he talks, you usually want to either laugh or hit him. Tonight, it is the latter, but not because of the bad pun.

"How do you always know?" You ask him plaintively. He just smirks at you.

"Am I wrong?" he asks.

"No," you sigh. " Really, how do you always know? I know that you're not psychic. "

"I could tell you, Brucey, but then I'd have to kill you," his tongue flicks across his lips slowly and you lean forward, into his space.. You don't know how he does it and it is both irritating and strangely reassuring that he does.

"Stop being so dramatic," you growl in his ear.

"You're the theatrical one, Batsy, " he retorts. You decide that it is definitely time for him to stop talking and you grab him and kiss him hungrily. He always tastes like cinnamon and cigarettes, just as he always smells like gasoline and gunpowder, even when you are both fresh out of the shower. Your mind digresses for a moment as you wonder how his senses perceive you.

"Black leather and expensive cologne, Brucey," he whispers in your ear and you growl in frustration and kiss him again, pulling him tight against you. You love the feel of his bare skin against yours.

 

When you break for air, he leans in and bites your neck and simultaneously you feel his finger inching around towards your ass and you start to think that maybe it isn't such a good or appealing idea after all when he whispers in your ear," Relax, Brucie. I'm going to prepare you, like you do me. Relax. "

He bites your neck again and you lean into it because you love it when he bites you and you scarcely notice when his finger breaches you. He definitely used a lot of oil and you're surprised that he's being so gentle but it's always like this when it's just him and you. When you're not Batman and Joker. And, it's the fact that he gets you that makes you trust him enough with this. He hits a spot inside you that makes your toes curl and he bites you again and you know you'll have to go with a turtle neck tomorrow and you're glad that it's November and cold enough to do that.

 

He sits up and looks at you.

"The only way this is going to work, Brucey, is if you climb on top and we do it that way. You are not dealing well with your lack of control at-all."

 

You realize that this is a good idea and you are surprised that he is being so nice about it and you just know that is going to change, but you want this . You shift positions and climb into his lap. You are gingerly trying to get him past the first ring of muscle when he viciously thrusts his hips up. You gasp in pain.

"Quit being such a pussy, Brucey," he thrusts again and this time he manages to hit that spot and you see stars. You rock your hips to meet his thrusts and it has rapidly become very pleasurable. You kiss him feverishly.

"Bite me," you moan as he breaks the kiss. He chuckles against your neck and obliges. This feels a lot better than you thought it would.

"Always so theatrical, Brucey, " he mocks, his lips against yours. You feel his twitchy hands in your hair and then the delicious pleasure as he yanks. You realize about this time that you haven't really given your cock any attention and at this point it is moot. Your combined movements are pounding on your prostate and you are going to come. You lift your head back to look at him and he looks into your eyes as your body jerks and shakes. He always does this because he likes to share the moment with you and you feel him spilling warm liquid into you.

 

Afterward, you carefully disengage and you flop down on the bed. He actually goes into the bathroom and gets a wet washcloth to clean up. You share it and he tosses it into the general direction of the bathroom.

"Feel better, Brucey?" His eyes are bright as he stares at you and he licks his lips." You were certainly a little drama queen about it."

"Shut up!" You growl at him. He does and you lay there for a minute. You don't realize that you have fallen asleep until you wake up. He is still there next to you, which you did not expect. He does this,stays the night, but not often.

"Hey," you look at him.

"Hey!" He turns over and you grab him and you have another go, this time back in your more traditional positioning. Your ass is a bit sore, but you survived and you are definitely going to do it again. You find that you liked the loss of control. When you finish, you take a shower and you finally check the time. You are surprised to find it so late and you realize that it is quite dark outside. You didn't check the weather before you left Gotham, but it looks like a bad rain storm outside. You open the door of the cabin and you realize that it is not rain, but snow. And quite a lot of it. There is about a foot and a half of snow on the ground and it is coming down fast and furious. There's no way you're getting back to Gotham. Luckily, you had the cabin stocked well- more for your comfort than something like this. There is plenty of wood for the wood burning stove and there is plenty of food. You shut the door and turn to him.

"That's why you didn't leave," you state.

"You got it, Brucey. We are stuck for the foreseeable future. "

You grab your cell phone and call Alfred. He sounds concerned, but you assure him that you are fine but stuck and you will be home soon. You realize that you could chance it because you drove an SUV to the cabin, but you also realize that the idea of spending a few days with him is tantalizing.


	4. A Joke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has Bottom! Bruce

There are advantages and disadvantages to being stuck in a one room cabin with your arch-enemy and lover. The first, which you immediately take advantage of, is that there isn't much to do. So the both of you decide to have a celebratory fuck-despite the fact that less than forty-five minutes have gone by since your previous mating. Then you settle down to sleep, you wake up and figure that your both hungry...this is where things start to become uncomfortable.

You realize that he talks all the time­- which normally wouldn't bother you, but now you can't say goodbye and go home. You're stuck. You stalk over to the door to see the snow has now increased to about 2 feet or so. He senses that you're irritated and really sets about irritating you. You finally retreat

into the bathroom carrying a novel. You hear him try to get some satellite reception- which actually does come through with the storm- and you decide to take a bath. The cabin is equipped with a Jacuzzi tub as well as a separate shower. You get in the tub and start the book- which is really stupid. Still, you read half of it and you look like a prune before you get out and pull on a heavy robe. You notice it's gotten colder and you pile some wood into the wood burning stove- enough to keep the two of you warm until morning. Only then do you look over and see him asleep on the bed. At least, you think that he's asleep-at least at first. You slide into bed next to him and he's all warm and you start kissing his neck because well...because.

You make your way to his chest, paying attention to his nipples. He's definitely awake now, but he's still kind of pretending to be asleep. The breath hitches are giving him away, though. You kiss your way down to his stomach and pause to run your tongue around his navel. That pretty much makes him give up the pretense of being asleep as he makes a sound between his trademark laugh and a moan as you do this.

You kiss lower and take him into your mouth. He has never allowed you to finish him this way and it has become somewhat of a point of honor with you. If someone had told you a year and a half ago that you would be fighting with the Joker over giving him a blow job, you would have told them to check into Arkham. He is bucking now, pulling at you." Bats," he whispers frantically.

You raise your head, using one elbow and forearm to hold him down across his stomach.

"Let me," you whisper. " I don't want....let me do this for you. " This is true. For some reason, you are not even hard.

"Let me, " you whisper again and entwine the fingers of your free hand with his.

He subsides and allows you to continue. It doesn't take him much longer. The problem is that when he does finish, you are not really expecting it and you are not quite sure whether to spit or swallow. You end up doing a bit of both and in the process, you start to cough.

He's lying there in sexual bliss but when he notices you coughing, he starts to laugh. OK, he actually cracks up.

"Sorry, Brucey," he gasps between giggles. " I did try to stop ya'."

"It's fine," you wipe your mouth on his stomach, which must tickle him because he giggles again.

You settle down next to him and you start to fall asleep.

"Hey, Brucey. You want to hear a joke?" You are almost asleep when he says this, so you sigh,"Yeah."

"What are the three biggest lies?"

"Is that the joke?"  
"Yeah, what are the three biggest lies?"

"I have no idea," You are starting to drift again despite yourself.

"The first one is:' I promise not to come in your mouth," he giggles.

"OK, what are the other two?"  
"I'll tell ya' tomorrow," he kisses your neck and you fall asleep.

 

The next morning you wake to him returning the favor and afterward, you let him top you again. It is actually pleasant to give up control like that and you are both in a good mood and you manage to get along fairly well until late afternoon. It starts slowly, but keeps building until you give a yell and attack him. You didn't really mean for it to get physical, but after the second punch, you realize that it's been about three weeks since you've had a really good Batman and Joker fight. The weather has been really cold lately and criminals, like most people, prefer to work in warmer weather. So, you haven't been going out as much and they haven't been committing many crimes. That seems irrelevant as you fight each other violently within the cabin. By the time the two of you calm down even remotely, the chairs and table are kindling. You have both landed on the bed and you both know who ever wins this time will top, but by this time you and he aren't really fighting. You are, but it's much more erotic than a fight should be. You manage to flip him over and you bite his neck and he goes limp.

"Mine," you whisper into his ear before you bite him again.

The fight serves as an aphrodisiac or something because you two end up fucking for hours. It's like the two of you took Viagra.

When you wind down, you ask him to tell you the rest of the joke.  
" What are the three biggest lies? What are the other two?"

"The second one is 'the check is in the mail.'"

"And what's the third?"

" I love you," he says.

"What?"

"The third biggest lie is 'I love you', " he answers, snuggling closer.

"So the joke is' what are the three biggest lies?' and the answers are 'I promise I won't come in your mouth, the check is in the mail and I love you?"

"Yeah," he says.

"That joke is so you, " you comment.

"I know," he says, giggling quietly.

 

You're not sure what time it is when you fall into an exhausted sleep wrapped around each other. You haven't looked outside since morning, so you don't realize that the snow has stopped. You also don't realize that you forgot to charge your phone. And because you've forgotten, you don't realize that your life is about to be turned upside down.


End file.
